


Beautiful Oblivious Moron

by FandomPariah



Category: RWBY
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluffy, M/M, Pining, Prompt mayhem challenge, Puns....so many puns, SeaMonkeys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 06:57:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16805701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomPariah/pseuds/FandomPariah
Summary: My contribution to the “Prompt Mayhem Challenge” in ladyvallhalla's Discord Server.The prompt I was given was “Sun and Neptune at a pool party” I hope I delivered.





	Beautiful Oblivious Moron

RWBY & All associated trademarks are property of Rooster Teeth (RIP Monty Oum)

I claim no ownership of anything except my own original characters.

I am making no money from this.

Beautiful Oblivious Moron

It seemed as though the entirety of Vale, if not Remnant as a whole had watched the opening matches of the Vytal Tournament and below amity stadium the streets of the city itself were all but overrun by the festival as a whole, the noise had reached Beacon Academy and robbed those few students who for one reason or another had not joined the party of sleep; among the revellers had been Team SSSN, all of whom were now beginning their weekends with spectacular hangovers

"Should have said no….really should have said no" Neptune grumbled between pained whines as he pulled the curtains a little tighter and pulled his sheets over himself, hiding his currently unkept hair from view. For a moment the only noises where the offensively loud chirping of birds outside, Sage's grunts and laboured breathing as he went through his morning warm-up routine that preceded an extensive session in the gym and the sound of the shower running, the leader of Team SSSN having risen early to claim the bathroom first; the blonde Faunus claiming that his ability to function despite the effects of copious amounts of alcohol was simply a Vaccuan thing, which his team-mates took to mean that he had misspent a sizeable portion of his youth in the wastelands of the desert Kingdom. A moment later the relative peace was intruded on by the somewhat high pitched cackling laugh of Scarlet David from the bunk above Neptune, Scarlet making his presence felt all the more by leaning over the edge of the bunk and prodding the prone form hidden beneath the bedsheets below him

"We've been telling you need to learn to say no to Sun since day one but you won't do it, all he's gotta do is flex and-" Scarlet found himself silenced as a tanned arm ventured from beneath the heap of blankets to swat at him blindly, Neptune's muffled voice coming from within them saying something which sounded decidedly unpleasant.

"So….what's on the agenda for today then?" Scarlet's question was aimed at Sage, his only response to Neptune's grumbled insult being a masterful example of a dramatic hair-flip which the slender teen followed up by rolling out of his bed and dropping to the ground with an utter lack of grace which stood in stark contrast to the agility he displayed on the battlefield.

"Will you watch where you're throwing yourself" Sage gave a long suffering sigh, having narrowly avoided having his team-mate fall on him

"Well I woke up to a text from Arslan" the larger man stated as he rose to his feet, deciding he'd done enough push-ups for the morning "She's heading to a party tonight. Reese has got a pair of filthy rich twins eating out of the palm of her hand, they invited her, she invited Arslan who invited us….well me"

"Sweet, I'm in" Scarlet gave a grin that toed a fine line between mischievous and maniacal before adding "Reese gets invited to all the best parties, this should be fun" Sage found himself suppressing an involuntary shudder at the thought of what Reese Chloris, the resident party animal of first Sanctum and then Haven Academy and Scarlet David, the sheltered child of Team SSSN who seemed to be desperately trying to make up for lost time and experiences could do if left unsupervised at a party together; Scarlet had seemed shy and reserved when they had first met but behind that initial quietness had been a plethora of antics and tomfoolery just waiting for an outlet.

"Sound like fun, I'll tag along….Where is it?" Sage hadn't noticed that the shower had stopped running but a half turn revealed that standing in the doorway to the steam filled bathroom was a still damp Sun Wukong, golden furred tail holding a towel in place slung low around his hips. Sage gave an amused snort

"Pool party on a private boat" he gave a pause before deciding that what he wanted to say needed to be said for his friend and leaders' benefit "And I suppose I didn't need to ask you to come, you would've just showed up anyway….just don't do any weird pervert shit this time. Either of you" Sage added the last words for Neptune's benefit, the tanned young man finally emerging and somehow managing to make his dishevelled appearance look as though it were both fashionable and intentional.

"No idea what you're talking about" Neptune muttered, Sage merely glared for a moment before deciding to enlighten him

"The antics with Team NDGO yesterday where you were a pervert and Sun was an idiot. Before that there was the whole thing with Team RWBY's window-"

"That was his idea" Neptune defended, throwing Sun under the proverbial bus to little effect as Sage finished with

"-where Sun was the pervert and you were the idiot for going along with it….People are gonna start talking about us at this rate"

"Alright, alright" Sun yawned as he stretched, oblivious to the way his partners' eyes roved over his exposed upper body "You made your point Sage….Hey Nep, you're coming as well right?"

"Water on more water" Neptune turned his head slightly, hoping that nobody would see the way his eyes widened in fear at the thought "I think I'll pass, besides someone needs to make a start on those assignments so the rest of you have got notes to copy"

"Nah we're good" Sun gave a devilish grin and Neptune forced himself not to visibly respond before the Faunus explained "The Dust stuff I know anyway, a couple of my uncles worked in the mines for a bit before they got laid off….as kids we used to sneak into empty shafts and see what we could find as well. The only other one was the weapon maintenance essay and I traded a favour with Merc-"

"Wait, Team CMEN Merc?" Scarlet asked with a raised eyebrow "That guy gives me the creeps"

"I know what you mean" Sun admitted with a shrug "But he knows his stuff and Em's cool, we've done lookout duty for each other-"

"Please just end that conversation there" Sage groaned "I don't wanna know. I really don't, if I don't know then I'm not an accessory to it" his comment got a laugh from his team-mates though it failed to distract Sun from his goal for long

"Come on Neptune man, I can't enjoy myself knowing that you're cooped in the library or something" Neptune thought of a dozen possible reasons he could give, a dozen half truths and misdirections each of which fizzled out and died on his tongue as the blue haired teen saw the faint smile and imploring look on Sun's face. He gave the only answer he could, the most annoyed sigh he could manage before allowing his resolve to collapse

"Alright….but I'm staying out of the water"

"That's cool man" Sun shrugged once more before turning his attention to his drawers as he began searching for his underwear and gym clothes; Sage's deep voice chiming in

"Okay I'm heading to the gym, Sun let's see if that Vaccuan liver of yours can take a few digs"

"Okay big man" Sun chuckled, draping his weapon over the back oh his neck in its' gun-chuck form as he dressed "I'll try not to send you to Arslan with your face scuffed up" the good natured bickering between the two was nothing new; their friendship had been a fragile thing when Team SSSN had first been formed in the Grimm filled ruins of Anima in which Haven held its' initiations, almost ending entirely after Sun had secreted himself upon a ship to leave Haven ahead of the other students in a clear dereliction of his duty.

"Don't make it sound like a favour" Sage laughed "You're scared of Arslan, and you should be" the whole of Team SSSN chuckled at this, Sage's face splitting into a fond smile at thought of Arslan with whom he had been friends for as long as he could remember; the two of them having begun officially dating not long after the formation of their respective teams.

"Yeah go on, scram….the smell of testosterone is getting overwhelming in here" Scarlet pouted and after a few more joking insults Sun and Sage left

"Yeah we'll catch up with you later" Sun chuckled, picking up his gym bag with his tail "I'll talk to Yang in the gym, see if she can convince Blake to come out tonight" Scarlet closed the door behind them, the smaller and far more wiry member of Team SSSN sauntering over to Sage's bunk which sat opposite to Neptune's where he regarded the resident intellectual

"He really does have you wrapped around his little finger doesn't he…..and he has absolutely no idea"

"Fuck off Scar" Nep tried to hide the bitterness behind a fake laugh

"Hey I'm not judging man" Scarlet splayed his arms wide and Neptune noted for the first time that his team-mate seemed to have accrued an inordinate number of hickies from somewhere "It's just kinda funny watching him chase Blake around not even realising you've got a big old crush on him" Neptune rolled over, turning his back to Scarlet

"Are we really gonna have this conversation?" he breathed out irritably, Scarlet remain dogged in his approach

"You mean the conversation where you finally figure out what you want and get your shit together, yeah I've got all day-"

"I know what I want Scar" Nep snapped suddenly annoyed at his friend "I just….It's not gonna happen-"

"So you're gonna lie to yourself and pretend to be straight instead?" Scar sounded equally annoyed at this point, the thought of Neptune never being true to himself something he would not abide

"I never said I was straight Scar" Neptune bit out "Okay….Weiss is, look Weiss is great and I was really attracted to her, I just don't think it'd work out. The girls on Team NDGO are all gorgeous; yes I know I owe them all an apology….I'm bi….I just keep it to myself"

"And now we're getting somewhere" Scar murmured, moving onto Neptune's bed and giving a light, friendly punch on the shoulder "Nep you're a cool guy….I don't mean that dumb posing and front you put up. You, the real you is a cool guy. Come out tonight, talk to Sun or whoever else….I'll wingman for you" Neptune turned to face him, the usual concern borne of a sharp mind prone to finding every possible flaw in a course of action written plainly on his face as he contemplated the idea. When he finally spoke it was in hushed, worried tones

"You think it's a good idea?" Scar gave a blunt answer, characterising his acerbic personality perfectly

"Well he's never gonna get the message on his own is he, he's a moron" Neptune chuckled softly

"Yeah….a beautiful, oblivious moron

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Sun had barely dipped below the horizon, casting the waves in a golden hue as Team SSSN reached the docks with Yang Xiao Long and the entirety of Team ABRN sauntering alongside them, the rapid fire jokes the blonde brawler had been exchanging with Reese Chloris coming to a halt as they caught sight of what was obviously the destination

"That is a needlessly fancy boat" Sage noted

"Is that an actual stage on the deck?" Neptune demanded, directing his attention anywhere but at the water

"Yeah when we get out onto the open water there's gonna be a rave and everything" Reese confirmed, "It's a 'ferry' nice set up" all present glanced between the skater and Yang who delivered precisely the kind of reply that they had expected with a wink and a smile

"I 'sea' what you did there looks like they went a little….'overboard'"

"Okay that's it, I'm out" Sage sighed, he and Arslan taking the lead and making their way towards the boat; Scarlet close behind them with Bolin and Nadir making a poor effort of hiding the fact that they were keeping an eye on him as per both team leaders' instructions, a drunk Scarlet David was something that needed to be contained for the good of everyone else in the vicinity if the testimony and haunted expressions of his team-mates were to be believed. Neptune eyed the boat, far too small to rightly be called a ship or liner but still much larger than he had expected, with some trepidation. The boat, oddly named, 'The Water Spider' appeared to be a miniature version of a luxury cruise ship with a ramp leading from the dock onto the main deck where a stage and full sized swimming pool complete with diving boards could be seen, behind which was the tower which held the control room from which the ship was piloted and its' currently hidden weapons systems operated. Neptune gulped audibly at the thought of being on the vessel when it left the dock, something that his partner must have noticed as the blue haired teen forced himself not jump in surprise when he felt a muscular arm drape across his shoulders

"It'll be fine man, don't worry" Sun murmured in his ear, quiet enough that only Neptune himself could hear the reassurance.

"Thanks" he whispered back, it was a gesture that Neptune would liked to have read more into were it not for Sun's next words which Neptune forced himself to smile through and pretend had no effect on his mood

"Hey Yang, any idea if Blake's gonna come out?" the monkey Faunus called over to Yang who was still talking to Reese, the conversation having seemingly moved beyond puns and jokes

"Am I not enough company for you?" Yang snorted in response before shaking her head "She missed some assignments when she was focusing on the White Fang, I gave her my notes but I don't think she'll get out here before the boat leaves. Ruby's too young and Weiss said she knew more than enough about these kind of parties thank you very much" Sun gave a disheartened groan before shrugging and pulling Neptune a little closer, arm still around his shoulders

"Come on let's go get the party started" the two had barely made it onto the ramp when Reese's voice called out after them

"Really, you're not even gonna 'Barge' in and make an entrance" Yang playfully ruffled Reese's distinctive hair and quipped

"I'm 'shore' they'll get up to some public 'in-decent-sea' at some point" Sun shook his head at the two of them, turning to Neptune and noting

"They're clearly trying to impress each other, it's cute" Neptune was left in stunned silence as he tried to work out how exactly his partner could seemingly observe everything except that which was right in front of him. The two of them made their way onto the deck of the boat where music way already playing, it's thumping bass pounding in Neptune's chest and many teens and young adults were clearly enjoying themselves; cursory glance around gave him a view of several rather attractive people showing off gratuitous amounts of skin and also that Sage and Arslan had found the bar and were waving them over; Sun managing to convey that they would join them soon with a series of gestures, Neptune was vaguely aware of Yang and Reese making their way onto the ship and joining the party with the undeniable flair and charisma that both women shared

"Hey Nep" Sun's voice instantly made Neptune focus "Wanna hang out by the pool….I'm not gonna try and make you get in the water but just y'know chill?"

"I don't….I'm not" Neptune bit back a curse as his frustration with himself got the better of him, anger overtaking fear for a brief moment before Sun gently placed a hand on his shoulder

"If not it's fine we can go somewhere else"

"I'm not seeing anywhere that isn't too close to water for my liking" Neptune grumbled, unable to keep his self imposed facade of being the calm and collected one from crumbling; Sun didn't seem to care in he slightest

"Wanna talk about it man?" the Faunus stepped a little closer, his tail gently wrapping around Neptune's waist as he guided the panicking teen away from the pool, doing so without any conscious thought. Neptune debated for a moment before finally nodding and swallowing the lump in his throat

"Fishing trip when I was seven….Dad wanted to get away from the family business for a weekend so it was the two of us and my uncle on Lake Kongju" he paused for a moment and let out a slow breath "Grimm came up from under us and bit the boat clean in half, Dad got me out but my Uncle…." he trailed off and Sun didn't need to ask for clarification to know that it had been the last time Neptune had seen his uncle

"Gods I'm sorry man, if I'd known I wouldn't have badgered you to come"

"It's fine"

"It's really not" Sun sighed, placing both hands on his partners' shoulders "Just tell me if I'm asking you to do something that makes you uncomfortable and I'll drop it, I promise" Neptune found himself looking away, utterly unable to meet Sun's gaze without his cheeks reddening and his customary confident smirk replaced by a genuine smile

"Sure will do Sun…..what on Remnant is he doing?" the subject changed as the azure haired teen became aware of two things in quick succession; firstly that many people had begun chanting, a chorus of 'Jump, jump, jump' slowly rising in volume, secondly that the subject of the crowds' attention was Scarlet David whom it appeared had already managed to slip Nadir and Bolin and was making his up the ladder to the highest available diving board; an impressive feat considering that he was doing so whilst blindfolded and without the use of his hands which were currently preoccupied by holding a pair of drinks

"Well, looks like the party's officially started" Sun chuckled with a shake of the head at the seemingly inevitable antics of his team-mate

"The sad part is that this isn't even record time for him" Neptune sighed "Please go stop him from hurting himself"

"On it….can I borrow your goggles for a sec?" Sun was shedding his already open shirt and kicking off his trainers as he spoke, handing his Scroll to Neptune who failed to respond for a moment due to his distraction

"Uh, yeah, yeah sure" he removed his goggles and handed them over without question and Sun donned them as he slipped through the crowd with the practised ease of a master pickpocket and scaled the ladder to the highest diving board with incredible agility where he engaged his Semblance, a pair of copies of the Faunus constructed of golden light grabbing hold of Scarlet while Sun himself removed the smaller Hunters' blindfold

"Like what is your friend doing?" a haughty voice demanded, Neptune only half turned, keeping an eye on Sun whilst at the same time seeing that the speaker was one of a pair of familiar twins whom he recognised from the bar Yang had taken him to

"Yeah, if they do anything stupid on our Aunt Missy's boat they'll be paying for it"

"Don't worry" Neptune assured them "Scar just likes to be the centre of attention….Sun's gonna reign him in by one upping him"

"Whatever" the Malachite twins huffed in unison whilst as if one cue the blonde Faunus casually back-flipped off of the highest diving board whilst wearing the blindfold himself; there was a moment lasting no more than a fraction of a second where Sun disappeared below the surface of the water and Neptune's heart felt as though it stopped beating, instantly aware that something wasn't right. The moment ended when lights and smoke billowed from where Sun had landed with a splash, the Faunus himself resurfacing whilst laughing like a madman at his own amateur mistake. Neptune buried his face in his palms as he realised that Sun must have had trace amounts and slivers of several different kinds of Dust crystals which when combined in small amounts and subjected to the mistreatment they had just experienced created an effect closer to a party trick than a cataclysmic explosion.

"Moron" Neptune whispered as he took several breaths and willed his hands to stop shaking and himself to stop thinking of all the ways things could have gone wrong for his partner "Beautiful oblivious moron"

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The boat had made its' way out onto the open water where the party could truly begin in earnest and for several hours the revellers had enjoyed themselves by the pool which had become the venue for a rave that was almost certainly illegal anywhere other than international waters as well as various kinds of debauchery Neptune was currently in no mood to think about. The more reserved member of Team SSSN had found himself clutching at the railings around the deck of the boat as far away from the party itself as possible without heading below deck, the cabins were currently occupied and frankly he didn't know or want to know what he may walk in on; he stared out at the open sea which surrounded him on al sides and suppressed a shudder at the thought of what horrors could lie beneath the dark and rippling surface which currently reflected the light of the stars and broken moon

"Should have just said no" Neptune grumbled under his breath, lamenting his utter inability to refuse Sun on anything; in private he could at least be open with himself and accept the fact that cared for his partner deeply and liked him in a way that was far from platonic. Letting out a breath that misted in front of him, the air being unseasonably cold he toyed absently with his goggles and tried once again to resign himself to the fact that Sun had shown no hints of being attracted to the same sex in the time they had known each other and was most likely utterly unaware of Neptune's feelings towards him due to the Faunus's own crush on Blake Belladonna.

"Cheer up you look like General Ironwood in his prime….a chilling thought" a drunken voice slurred and Neptune rolled his eyes as he turned and reflexively reached out to physically support a staggering Scarlet David; the amount of alcohol the small teen had consumed in such a short amount of time combined with the rocking of the boat leaving him unsteady as he pressed a drink into Neptune's hand with a stage whisper followed by a gleefully manic cackle "Take this, I spiked it"

"You spiked the drinks….at a party where everyone was getting drunk anyway?" Neptune asked in confusion, deep down knowing he should know better than to question Scarlet's actions when drunk

"It's the principle!" Scarlet exclaimed with a hair flip "Do it for the culture!" Neptune sighed and decided that he may need a drink after all if he was going to be playing minder to his team-mate who could best be described as havoc incarnate; he took a sip only to spray it over the side of the ship and glare at the offending beverage

"When you spiked it, how big was the spike?" he demanded of Scarlet who was currently doubled over with silent laughter "And where is everyone?" Scarlet took a few attempts to recover enough to speak, whatever answer he was trying to give sending him back into fits of drunken titters once again

"Well the two bookends from Team BRNZ that Sun told to babysit me are currently barely conscious after letting me mix their drinks, cute but not my type. Sage and Arslan slunk off, I think they're in one of the cabins but I'm not gonna look. Reese got on stage and had a rap battle with one of the guys performing….I'm so proud; she's blatantly showing off for Yang" Neptune couldn't help but chuckle at the mental image until Scarlet spoke again in a sing-song voice, giving him a knowing wink "But that's not who you're asking for is it?" Neptune gave a wordless groan of displeasure at both having to retread this conversation and how easily Scarlet could read him. Scarlet proceeded to haul himself up onto the railings Neptune was leaning against and perch precariously in an acrobatic movement that made Neptune's heart leap into his mouth while he reached out and clamped his hand firmly around his friends' upper arm

"Can you please get down from there?" he insisted, Scarlet merely shrugged

"It's fine man, you worry too much" Neptune grit his teeth for a moment before asking a question he had wanted to know the answer to for a while; dropping all pretence and carefully cultivated image as he did so

"How do you guys do it?" he paused and saw that Scar was giving him a vacant and somewhat glassy stare with bloodshot eyes "You, Sun, Sage….you're all effortlessly cool; I just….I dunno man I feel like I'm constantly fighting against myself to fit in-" Scarlet's response was to interrupt with a fit of laughter

"Well there's your first problem Nep, stop trying to fit in….Shit the real you is cooler than the guy you pretend to be anyway" Scarlet gave him a playful wink "You think I asked if the handsome lovable rogue spot was vacant before I filled it? Hell no, just carve out a space for yourself"

"How on Remnant do you manage to make that much sense while you're drunk?" Neptune asked in disbelief, Scarlet merely shrugged and the conversation came to a halt as a pair of new voices made themselves known

"It was probably that monkey Faunus, I saw him swiping drinks from tables earlier" a young woman dressed in obviously expensive clothes declared in a nasally and somewhat whining voice with a distinct valley girl accent; Neptune assumed she was a friend of the twins who were throwing the party. The person she was speaking to however was instantly recognisable with his pale green Mohawk; Russell Thrush of Team CRDL was, despite what one would infer from the way he presented himself, a member of a quite well off family and was routinely seen at parties with rich kids who wanted to brag about having a Huntsman they could call in case of emergency, usually in the company of young women who wanted to be seen with a stereotypical 'bad-boy' regardless of how repugnant their personality was.

"Wukong" Russell sneered, nose wrinkling at the thought of Team SSSN's leader "We have classes together at Beacon, I'm sure I've seen him taking food off of peoples' trays in the canteen….might be a Haven student but he's a fucking Vaccuan animal" Neptune's eyes narrowed as his knuckles clenched in silent fury; Russell and his acquaintance had obviously not spotted him yet, neither of them turning towards the sound when Scarlet hopped down from the railing he had been sat on. Neptune threw an arm in front of Scarlet's chest before he could do something reckless, instead he simply leaned close and whispered in Neptune's ear

"Gonna let him talk about your man like that Nep?….You can take him" Neptune knew on an intellectual level that he shouldn't rise to his drunken friends' bait, but frankly Neptune wasn't in the mood to be an intellectual at the moment, he had heard Team CRDL and people like them insult Sun behind his back enough times and whether it was the drinks he'd consumed over the course of the evening or a sudden burst of bravery he decided that he wasn't going to stand for it tonight. Silently he slipped his jacket off and handed it to Scarlet who seemed delighted at this turn of events; Neptune rolled his shoulders back and clenched his fist as he stalked over to where Russell stood

"Hey, hey Russ….Hey come here a sec, I just wanna talk to you now Cardin isn't here to wipe your tears and rock you to sleep afterwards" whatever scathing retort Russell had intended to deliver was left unsaid as he staggered back clutching his face when Neptune's sucker punch connected and such was the distraction it created that no-one present saw a monstrous dark shape breach the surface of the waves for a brief moment as it stalked the boat.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sun Wukong had taken up residence upon the highest diving board of the pool; partially because it afforded him a view of everything happening below and partially because it would hopefully deter Scarlet from any more poorly thought out drunken antics. The key, Sun had realised, to dealing with Scarlet was to simply one up him and deny him an audience to perform to. He took a sip of a bottle of beer he was currently holding in his tail as he scanned the party below him which was currently in full swing, a pool party combined with an illegal rave was something that the Monkey Faunus had honestly expected to find more enjoyable than he did, although he could attribute his current lack of enthusiasm to the fact his team-mates were nowhere to be found with the exception of Sage whom Sun could tell didn't want to be bothered right now. Letting out a sigh he set his bottle down and searched the mass of dancing bodies for Neptune whilst inwardly admitting it was a futile effort, Neptune's insecurities about his dancing were well known and he had yet to lighten up despite Sun's numerous attempts to try and convince that nobody was really watching; he couldn't even message his partner due to Neptune still having his Scroll. Eventually Sun decided it might be time to enlist help and wrapped his tail around the last step of the diving boards' ladder before letting himself drop over the edge of his current perch; he came to a stop suspended upside down in front of Yang and Reese who had nestled themselves away on the board below in search of some privacy if the baleful look Yang was giving him and the way Reese's head rested on her shoulder was any indication. The blonde's usual love of parties such as this had been subdued somewhat by the revelation that the party was being thrown by the Malachite Twins whom Yang was hardly on amicable terms with; deciding to break the ice with a joke Sun flashed the two a grin and said

"Hey I'm just looking for Neptune and was wondering if you've seen him anywhere?….Or were you busy planning out Reese's rap career?" Reese merely rolled her eyes and performed the admirable feat of delivering a pun faster than Yang Xiao Long.

"Marmoset knock you out" the way she delivered the words was familiar and Sun knew exactly what song she was referencing; apparently so did Yang as she snorted with laughter while loosely wrapping an arm around Reese before adding

"Has he gibbon you the slip?"

"Gods damn it all" Sun laughed good naturedly before Yang added "We haven't seen him in a while, he might be with Scar though; the little maniac left Bolin and Nadir black-out drunk"

"He did what?" Sun demanded, all other priorities being overridden by the fact that Scarlet David was now roaming freely about a luxury boat, most likely owned by criminals, while drunk. It was a sign of how serious the situation was that even Reese seemed a little concerned.

"Sounds like that's an emergency?" Yang noted as she caught sight of the way Sun's expression changed

"Code red"

"Code Scarlet" Reese amended with a drunken giggle, before either of the two blondes present could comment on that there was a commotion below which resulted in the music abruptly halting and the air being filled with panicked and angry voices

"Um found him….Oh shit" Yang breathed out; Sun turned in the direction of whatever was happening just in time to see Neptune, who seemed to sporting a black eye tackling one of the Beacon Students with an attitude problem, Sun thought his name started with an R, into the pool which prompted those party-goes currently in and around it to flee as far as they could in the admittedly small space, nobody wanted to be between two Hunters when things got physical.

"Oh no" Sun's stomach plummeted as he watched Neptune land in the pool with a splash, still grappling and landing blows on Russell Thrush but the Faunus knew that it would only be a few seconds until the realisation of what had just happened sunk in

"Oh yes" Yang laughed "I've wanted to do that to Team CRDL for months, get him Nep-"

"He's scared of water!" Sun snapped, suddenly exceedingly worried. A moment later the inevitable happened and Neptune conscious mind broke through the fog of adrenaline enough to protest about the fact he was currently partially submerged in water; the azure haired teen froze and his eyes widened in shock while his hands began to tremble, leaving him utterly unprepared to defend himself for Russell's savage retaliation. Making matters worse Sun could see the familiar form of Cardin Winchester wading through the crowd and unfurling his Dust powered mace, named Jericho, clearly having no intention of fighting fair.

"I'm breaking this up" Sun informed Yang and Reese and without waiting for a reply launched himself from the diving boards to the edge of the pool where he immediately activated his Semblance and sent a pair of clones constructed of solid golden light into the pool, one to drag Neptune out and one to restrain Russell by any means necessary; Sun planted himself firmly between his partner and Cardin

"You getting involved fleabag?"

"Nothing to get involved in, it's over and done with" Sun answered calmly, refusing to rise to the bait that the racist jibe clearly was; while at the same time working his tail under his shirt to grab his gun-chucks just in case things went further south.

"Not by a long shot" Cardin growled, clearly trying to make himself seem as threatening as possible; Sun found the attempt laughable. Quickly scanning the crowd he saw Sage and Arslan who both seemed to be holding the other back from making their way over and giving everyone involved a piece of their minds. Scarlet could be seen approaching twirling his pistol around on his trigger finger in a way that would most likely see him blow a hole through the hull if he wasn't stopped and the twins who threw the party were stalking through the crowd, both looking equally murderous. The simian Faunus decided that this was not a priority and created another Aura clone to hold Cardin at bay before turning and making his way over to Neptune, the clone that had pulled him free of the water vanishing as Sun himself pulled him into a one armed hug and wrapped his tail around a still shaking hand; noticing as he did so just how profusely his partners' eyebrow was bleeding from where Russell had smashed it against the edge of the pool

"Deep breaths man, slow deep breaths. It's okay, you're out, I'm gonna get you off this boat and back to Beacon-" he felt Neptune nod in understanding though any verbal response he gave was muffled as he clutched on to Sun as though his life depended on it

"Hey ass-holes" the voice belonged to one of the Malachite twins, clearly building up momentum for a scathing tirade "You cannot just come onto our uncles boat, trash our party and leave. Who do you think you-" whatever else they had intended to say was cut off by a shrill and piercing scream followed by the unmistakable lurching of the boat as something burst from the water, followed by another

"GRIMM!" the cry went out and pandemonium ensued within seconds as party-goers desperately scrambled towards the lifeboats mounted on the other side of the vessel. The Grimm in question were each roughly twice as broad as Sun was across the shoulders, with muscular serpentine forms ending in bulbous heads, though they lacked the usual glowing red eyes of their kind they were still of living darkness and covered in bone white spiky carapaces

"Are those Leviathan?" Sun demanded, having heard of the sea-serpent Grimm from sailors on his way from Vaccuo to Anima.

"No" Neptune's voice trembled and the colour drained from his face as he correctly identified what Sun had thought were heads and torsos "Those aren't bodies, they're tentacles. It's a Kraken" Sun immediately realised the severity of the situation and launched himself forwards as the first of the two tentacles raised over the boat like the axes of some aquatic executioner began to fall

"TEAM SSSN, BRING THIS SQUID DOWN!" He bellowed as he vaulted over strewn tables and anyone unfortunate enough to still be in the way whilst drawing his weapon and conjuring as many clones as he could muster to grab the tentacle as it fell; the weight of the writhing limb crashed down on him and buckled his knees though his Semblance held firm and prevented the tentacle from smashing through the deck and tearing through the hull. The sound of screeching metal informed and screaming civilians informed him that the second tentacle had been more successful in its' attack; a brief glance in the direction that it had fallen shaking the Faunus to his core as he realised that the prow of the Water Spider was simply gone, torn asunder and cast into the depths below, sparks spraying from the gash in the boat. The Kraken made to rear the tentacle Sun was restraining back for another blow and the Monkey Faunus desperately searched for something to use as an anchoring point

"Hold on!" Neptune's voice sounded out and while Neptune himself may have been scared beyond comprehension as he leapt into the air and stabbed downwards, burying his trident in the tip of the tentacle, the blades bursting from the bottom of the appendage and skewering it for a moment the sight was enough to convince Sun that they just might make it off this boat after all.

"Coming through!" Reese warned as she soared overhead on her hover-board, the Dust powered vehicle currently being fuelled by Ice Dust and as she leapt over the breadth of the tentacle a band of obsidian flesh perhaps two feet across was frozen solid; providing Yang Xiao Long to rush forwards and deliver a devastating punch whilst discharging Ember Celica; eyes blood red, hair glowing and a fearsome war cry on her lips as she shattered the frozen area in a single blow, neatly severing the tentacle which began to fade into mist, barely visible in the darkness. Yang turned to face Sun and Neptune and gave them both a confident smirk

"Just 'Kraken' open a cold one with the boys"

"What a woman" Neptune mouthed, whatever his feelings were towards Sun and previously Weiss he could admit to himself that Yang was simply awe-inspiring in her limitless self-assurance. The dramatic entrance ended quickly, the four Hunters taking stock of the situation and seeing with abject horror that more tentacles had slithered up from the depths and over the side of the boat; these appendages were much slimmer and far more agile than the larger tentacle Yang had just destroyed, these were bladed weapons whose tips were an edged oval shape and smooth like a pebble that had been eroded away. Sun's mouth hung open as he watched the scene around him unfold, the smaller tentacles darted around as they sought out blood to spill whilst the assembled student Hunters put themselves between the Grimm and the civilians and fought mercilessly; Scarlet, despite his seeming inebriation, had drawn his cutlass and was single handedly holding a dozen tentacles at bay in a display of swordsmanship and daring acrobatics that beggared belief, Cardin Winchester had put himself directly in harms' way and was using the fist sized Fire Dust Crystal embedded in his weapon to hold the tentacles at bay while Russell Thrush darted around, almost crazed with fury as he cut down anything that approached his partner or the people they were protecting; the Malachite twins, while not Huntresses were doing an admirable job of holding their own, using each others' bodies as springboards as they kept up a constant barrage of attacks on the writing limbs whilst a handful of Hei 'Junior' Xiong's henchmen of the Black Bear Syndicate opened fire with limited success. Sun's eyes however quickly homed in on the second of the larger tentacles, the one that the Kraken had used to tear the prow of the Water Spider away; it rose up into the air again as the Grimm prepared to deliver a crushing blow that would break the vessel in half

"NOW!" as the tentacle came crashing down the Faunus heard the familiar voice of Sage Ayana bellow out and was left to watch in stunned silence as his team-mate clutched onto the rope that Arslan Altan kept her Dust tipped dagger attached to as Arslan hurled him through the air and swung him; Sage's sword acting as the blade of an improvised scythe as he was sent hurtling in a wide arc that saw him cleave through the second monstrous tentacle before it could impact with the boat. He let go of the rope and rolled across the deck, coming to a stop in a crouch in front of Sun, Neptune, Reese and Yang

"Probably not the best time but that's totally mine and Blake's move from the tournament" Yang noted

"Yeah that's where Arslan got the idea" Sage admitted as he rose to his feet; the assembled Hunters and fighters converged on their position

"That's the big tentacles down but we need a pan" Sun began only for Russell's sneering tone to cut across him

"Here's a plan, we get fucking moving"

"We can't" Miltia Malachite informed them "One of out people has been in touch with the captain, there's a few more big tentacles holding us in place; they've done some damage to the engine"

"Okay" Sun took a moment to think, casually snapping off a shot at a tentacle that reared up behind Neptune before it could get within a dozen feet "How many lifeboats have we got?"

"Enough" Melanie Malachite assured him "We can get the guests on the boats on the other side of the boat to the Grimm"

"Okay good, we need people to get on the lifeboats with them in case more Grimm get drawn in….Team ABRN"

"We're on it" Arslan nodded solemnly, gesturing for Reese, Nadir and Bolin to begin rounding up the passengers

"Take our people with you, the more guns the better" Melanie offered whilst gesturing for the tuxedo clad mobsters to get to work. Arslan nodded in thanks and made to head to the nearest lifeboat only for Sage to stop her with a hand on her shoulder, trembling with unspoken nerves

"Stay safe out there Ars...I love you" she cupped his cheeks and pulled his head down into a brief but tender kiss

"You too Sage"

"Hey monkey boy" Miltia Malachite got Sun's attention "This is the family boat, there's more crew below deck and the Malachite family looks after it's own. Mel and I are going to get them and then the captain"

"We're coming with" Cardin grunted out, twirling his mace "I'm not taking orders from him"

"And fuck you too" Sun snarled back "Fine get moving" the blonde Faunus took stock of the situation and realised that the task of taking down the Kraken itself had fallen to Team SSSN and Yang Xiao Long, Yang however had other ideas

"Hey, Mil, Mel?" the twins halted and waited for Yang to speak "Does this boat have any weapons?"

"Yeah but the engine, duh" Melanie huffed

"We just said that" Mil grumbled, Yang rolled her amethyst eyes and turned to Sun

"I can fix it" the confidence she spoke with lacked any boastfulness and was a simple statement of fact; Sun processed the information and made a snap decision

"Sage, Scar go with her; she can fight but she can't fight and fix at the same time….I don't want any surprises like this thing putting a tentacle through the hull where she's working" his team-mates complied and a moment later it was Sun and Neptune alone on the deck as the last of the life boats was lowered into the sea and the rest of the fighters went their separate ways; the few remaining tentacles slithering between overturned deckchairs and tables and roughly ripping the diving board away from the pool in act of seemingly spiteful destruction.

"Okay, just us then?" Neptune's attempt at nonchalance failed miserably as his voice wavered and betrayed the terror that had threatened to engulf him "Got a plan?"

"Nope" Sun admitted, the carefree tone of voice strained and the playful smile obviously hiding deep concerns "Was kinda hoping my favourite intellectual would have something for this part….Lead the way Nep, I've got your back" before Neptune could respond the Kraken made its' move; the tentacles that had been holding the boat, damaging internal components through sheer pressure and threatening to collapse and breach the hull unfurled and rose above the waves along with the body of the Kraken itself; its' body resembled that of a squid but with nightmarish proportions, four giant tentacles with scores of smaller and thinner limbs around them and at the point where they met was a gaping maw lined with countless row of fangs each roughly the size of a person; the things eyes were countless and glowed angry red, illuminating the body and revealing its' true horrific scale; Neptune let out a whine of fear

"It's gonna be fine" Sun assured him, tail reflexively wrapping around his partners' wrist "It's gonna be fine Nep; I'll get us out of this" Neptune had no idea what came over him, perhaps it was that the fear of an impending watery grave overrode every other fear or concern he could possibly have, perhaps it was a moment of personal bravery; whatever the case Neptune pulled Sun into a tight hug and pressed his lips gently against the Faunus's, his voice trembling as he spoke

"You need a plan I'll get you a plan, I'll get us out of this" Sun was taken aback but a roguish smile tugged at his lips

"That's the spirit….now or never dude" with that the blonde Faunus slipped free of Neptune's grasp and rushed towards the edge of the boat, preparing to meet the Grimm head on and draw its' attention away from the task of rending the vessel apart. Neptune watched in horror as Sun performed acrobatic leap after leap, sending his Semblance clones ahead to pull him out of harms' way; his gun-chucks firing round after round into the Krakens' eyes as its' tentacles attempted to swat him away.

"Okay think Nep think, think, think" Neptune muttered under his breath, time seemed to slow to a crawl as a wall of freezing seawater, displaced by the Grimm's attacks, washed over him and everything seemed to fall into place in his mind

"The water" he breathed out to himself as he lowered his goggles and sprinted across what remained of the deck, shifting its' weapon into its' ranged form as he ran

"Nep what're you doing?" Sun called out as he watched his partner brace himself against one of the last remaining sections of railing, the telltale whining hum of his weapon charging to full power filling the air; Neptune spoke with an eerie calm that shook the Faunus more than screams of terror would have

"Just keep the tentacles off me Sun" Sun sprung into action at the same moment Neptune fired; an arc of lightning firing down and missing the Kraken entirely instead striking the water around it. Golden clones surrounded Neptune as Sun fought beside him, the shrieking of the Kraken sounding as though the world itself were being torn in half as the Grimm was electrocuted to death, its' body slowly losing cohesion and fading into black mist as the light in its' eyes flickered and dimmed

"IT'S WORKING" Sun called out to "NEP IT'S-" Neptune didn't see the tentacle fall and smash into the deck of the boat, all he knew was that he was suddenly falling towards water which still arced and crackled with electricity following his onslaught with very little time to make peace with the fact he was most likely about to die. He halted, suspended mere feet away from the water with a pair of strong arms wrapped around him

"I've got you" Sun promised, looking up Neptune saw that Sun had recklessly flung himself off the edge of the boat and used his Semblance to form a chain, each clone grabbing onto the tail of the next and pulling the pair back up onto the deck. In seconds they were back on the relative peace of the deck with their blood still pounding in their ears and hearts hammering in their chests as their breathing came back under control slowly Sun spotted Atlesian ships in the distance slowly drawing closer, evidently someone aboard the lifeboats had called for assistance; a moment later the ship lurched and mechanical components screeched in protest as they whirred back into life despite the abuse that they'd been put through

"Yang actually did-" Sun was cut off as Neptune turned and barrelled into him, almost knocking him over with the force of the crushing hug he pulled the Faunus into, Sun returned the gesture and felt himself blush a little awkwardly as Neptune buried his face in his neck

"So um….what happened a second ago" Sun began nervously, his words halting and unusually bashful in tone "Um, we kinda need to talk about that at some point….Quick question, are you gonna kiss me again?" Neptune pulled back and met his eyes

"Yes, you beautiful, oblivious moron" he pulled his partner into a slow and gentle kiss which lasted until their friends who had been working below deck found them like that.  
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Authors Notes:

Okay this one was interesting to write, Sea-Monkeys' isn't something I ship personally but getting out of my comfort zone was a fun little challenge.

Nothing really to add so let's summarise:  
You can't convince me the teams that won in the first round didn't go out and get shit-faced…..Although headcanon that Team JNPR were one of the few that didn't.  
I love the idea that Scarlet David looks all sweet and innocent, is shy at first but there's actually an absolute legend of a party animal just waiting to get out.  
Also….he's a master of the dramatic hair-flip.  
Sage and Arslan is a background character ship that just works aesthetically.  
I feel like someone on Team SSSN has to call Sun out on his occasional idiocy and Sage feels like the natural choice.  
I feel like Merc and Em most likely integrated themselves into the other students really well and it actually really hurt a lot of the Haven students to find out that they were involved in the fall of Beacon.  
Closeted bi Neptune is a headcanon that just makes sense to me, he flirts with women and goes way overboard with it because he's compensating for the fact he isn't comfortable with his sexuality yet.  
Also Neptune is constantly putting up a front and under all that cool facade he's just a total dork….which is why I like Neptune and either Ruby or Weiss as rare-pairs; they're interesting ways to develop each others' characters because Ruby is just as much of a dork as Neptune but she's more open with it and Yang just oozes self confidence despite her own issues….but we're getting off topic.  
I actually wrote a Yang and Reese short in the RWBY Rare Pair challenge last year; I headcanon that Reese is basically the Yang of Haven and at some point they just clicked.  
Ah the puns, they're a pleasure to write.  
"The Water Spider" because it's owned by the Malachites.  
Okay so the pool is on a boat, the prompt I got was "Pool Party with Sun and Neptune" you'll forgive me for taking some liberties right?  
Weiss has definitely been to one spoiled rich kids party and said "Fuck everything about this"  
Back-story, can we get some for Team SSSN…..I know we probably won't in canon but hey that's what us writers are here for,  
And so it begins, Scarlet is already blindfolded and duel-wielding drinks.  
Aunt Missy….Little Miss Malachite.  
Sun turned himself into a Bath-Bomb.  
Seriously never walk into random rooms at a party without knocking.  
"You think I asked if the handsome lovable rogue spot was vacant before I filled it? Hell no, just carve out a space for yourself" - Be like Scarlet David, you will be so much happier.  
When Neptune decides to stop being intellectual and start throwing hands you know it's gonna go off.  
It's a boat full of hormonal and drunk teens….of course it fucking attracted Grimm.  
"Marmoset knock you out" is honestly quite possibly one of the things I am most proud of.  
Everyone wants to flatten Team CRDL; even Penny beat their asses in the tournament.  
A Kraken Grimm….Honestly this was my main reason to have the pool party at sea; there's more you can do with aquatic Grimm once you're out of the Kingdoms' walls.  
"Just Kraken open a cold one with the boys" I'll be honest with you that was the first line that came to mind when I decided to have a giant squid Grimm and a good part of the reason Yang is in this story.  
"What a woman" was an homage to canon and nothing else.  
Now I think of it I'm imagining Scar's drunken fighting style to be a mix of Qrow and Winter.  
Yes Sage and Arslan just did the Bumblebee team attack or a variation on it.  
After seeing how well protected the train was in volume six episode one I can't imagine that boats aren't just as well prepared….even the boat Blake was on in volume four had a big old cannon.  
Yang modified her arm, one handed….she can fix the boat.  
I want to see more of Sun actually leading his team; I want to see a Sun that steps up, takes charge and handles the job.  
Decisive leadership is good, but always default to the guy with the brains when you can.  
And there it is, there's the money shot you all came to see.  
Okay just firing into the water might have been a cop out win but literally what is the point of having a gun that shoots lightning if you're not gonna use it for that at least once.  
And cue dramatic rescue from Sun, I am just full of cliches today.  
And fade to black on the beautiful oblivious moron.

As always thank you to everyone that reads this, with a special thanks to those of you that follow, favourite and review.


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